My kid said 4 year old edition (part 1)
4yo: Is a ‘pagina’ like a penis?
4yo: Mommy, I’m going to clean up my toys in a different order.
4yo: Yes, a different order. (Goes and moves a few toys around from one spot on the floor to another.) OK, mommy, can I watch TV now?
Me: Not until they’re where they belong.
4yo: But I put them in a different order! The new order is on the floor!
4yo: Mom, can I have that?
Me: (pointing at myself) Mommy
4yo: (points at me) Mom (points at himself) me
He’s been trying his hand at knock knock jokes.
4yo: Knock, knock, come in! Interesting pig. Moo.
4yo: Sir, what would you like?
Me: Um, how about a banana split?
4yo: We don’t have that.
Me: What do you have?
4yo: Nothing. This is a playground.
Bonus D says:
Me: I’m thinking of listening to podcasts while I run, though I like situational awareness.
D: Situational Awareness?
Me: Yeah you know being able to hear things going on around me and not zoning out too much.
D: Oh, ok. I wasn’t sure if you were talking about some podcast called Situational Awareness–don’t look at me like that, you know that’s something that NPR would name a show.